Rejection feels like…..
Being thrown away in the trash! When we are rejected by others or “feel” like others are rejecting us, you can liken the feeling to how a sheet of paper would feel when it is balled up and tossed in the trash receptacle—A dirty, dark, smelly, constricted, nasty space! Yuck! Being rejected feels like the person who rejected us took out their phone and held their finger over our image until that trashcan icon popped up with the word “Delete?”—and they hit “Confirm”.
Rejection may have started with something more malignant like neglect, abandonment, or hurt from a mother or father, but recurring rejection often surfaces through seemingly benign occurrences like these:
- When we are overlooked for praise, positions and promotions
- We are not on the “guest list”
- When “so & so” didn’t give us the hello or good-bye we thought we deserved
- You haven’t received a phone call or text in a week
- He/she moves on with someone “new”
- Other’s body language during interactions (lack of eye contact, non-affectionate hug/handshake, emotionless face)
- Not getting enough Instagram and Facebook “likes” or Twitter “follows”
- Seeing a group of “important” people huddled up talking as you sit alone
- Not getting enough support for something positive you’re doing
- Not getting enough sympathy for your bad news or celebration for your good news
We could go on and on, but we hope you get the drift of how benign the above incidences really are and how rejection can rear its hideous head. Rejection has such a power, that when it is loosed, it incapacitates you and jolts you into that dumpster and leaves you there to die! And as you waffle around in there waiting on rescue through way of affirmation, the stench of your environment gets in your pores. When you get out of that dump, that stench will hide under the perfume you use to mask your secret. You’re insecure and you don’t want anyone to know! You’ve been through this routine more times than you can count—In the dump…Out of the dump….In the dump….Out of the dump!!
Our question is simple! Why do you keep letting people put you in the dump? Who gave them the power to do so? Whose “dry” hello caused you to feel bad about yourself and catapulted you to the trash bin? A dump is no place for royalty! A dump is no place for someone with your value, your worth, your gifts, your distinctiveness! You are like gold, and what good is gold tossed in the garbage?
It’s time to get acquainted with your value and stop allowing others to make you feel like trash! No matter what encounters you have with people that rub you the wrong way, remember the God who put His stamp of approval on you when you were in your mother’s womb—an indestructible, irreversible, indisputable, unalterable, unshakeable stamp!!!
So here’s what we want you to do! Take your foot—whichever one kicks the hardest—-and aim toward that garbage can that you keep allowing others to toss you in to—-and kick it like you’re trying to kick it to hell! And remember you’re sending it there on a ONE-WAY ticket! Get out of the dump of rejection and stay out!
Identical twin sisters Lanelle and Leatisher Jackson, affectionately known as Nell and Tish, are both licensed professional counselors in the State of Ohio; treating children, adolescents, adults and families. For additional information, contact firstname.lastname@example.org